Sept.....................
I now fear for Joshua's safety Somewhere in the country probably in a truck stop. What a life she wants for him

 To: Dept family services (DFAC), Friends & Family and whom it may concern.
     What a mess this has all turned out to be, if someone would just have listened to me or talked with me about these things we might have gotten help sooner, I guess there is nothing in place to see this sort of thing early, because she has been in distress since she arrived last year.
     This is typed in response to the resent event about Diane L. Cullen & Joshua David Donahue, all the problems came to a head today (8/24/01) when I declined never to sign a passport to let Joshua go to England for the last time, because she has said she would not bring him back.
     For the reasons laid out below, I now consider Diane to be an un-fit mother and should not be allowed to raise Joshua, “because she is being watched & I was assured by the sheriffs Dept that they would be ok Fri. I feel ok for now” I am asking you to please hear me so we dont have a bigger problem. 
     Some of these reasons may be legal, some may be personal observations that’s up to the court & doctors to decide.
     Although I am on the Birth Cert. Monday I am going to hire a lawyer to get a court order for a blood test if I can afford it so I can take this mess to court and get Full Custody of Joshua, and then maybe someone will talk to me, I have already informed a few Gov. agencies like Passport for fear of flight, and Diane’s Drug Problem. and doctors just a few of the places I can remember her buying them are Kroger Peachtree city, Walmart, Sam Goodys, CVS, you can pull all the history you need.
     I didn’t know the reasons that DFAC came Fri. and picked up Diane & Joshua? no one talks to me that really needed to, the doctors, hospital and now DFAC, I did try all day to get a hold of someone - anyone that would talk I tried every where all the doctors and hospital or case worker from before, DFAC was last resort but by the time I went to the sheriffs office to ask for a DFAC case worker by 6PM they said they already had them, and both would be safe, I do not know why, maybe she turned her self in, we had that conversation in the morning. Then she took Moms car and went somewhere, I assumed the doctor.
    She is looking for something in life through things....that she feels the need for someone or something to fill a gap, Like Drugs or lots of travel and may never settle down in one place to be stable, she needs something and I don’t know what it is, she was always trying to hide things and feelings from me or just make something up as chat, never really bonding to me or hiding in a fantasy world of movies, books & lies. Only to come out when we were in public to put on a good show, and she is a real good actor, putting up a front for people. So I played along and came up with a few of my own. (Maybe not so good of an idea)
     I cant take her problems anymore, no one seems to want to help, even her family don’t seem to, and I have talked with her mother about all the problems and all she said was “ we kind of felt she had problems” Ok, no help! I just kept my mouth shut, and let things play them self’s out, I guess that was bad too, it seems every time I talked to someone no one had any good answers. I did not talk to my mom because she was close and I didn't want her to get an attitude to Diane and possibly make things worse, Maybe I should have, well now I am sorry to say it is to late, I wish we could have gotten her help a year ago, or if someone would have followed up with her after the Dec. 19 incident (Over Dose on prescription and went to Peacetree Hosp. when she was pregnant)
     I tried, but this whole year was one big lie she is hiding in, right from the first phone call when she said she had Green eyes and I didn't find out till after she was here she was hiding behind contact lenses and there blue now, and other times when she just makes things bigger then they are, still lies.
     I should have known better I had a few chances to cut it off before she came here to live, after we met face to face and spent a week together, I thought this one would be forever and she went back to pack and move here, but she did not seem to want to come back right away, after a few weeks I started to wonder, then one day I got a funny email from the laptop I sent back with her Randy was using it and emailed me by accident and it said (I love you and the time we spend together and all our little quickies sent by Randy) then I read an email from her to her brother she said :
    (My neighbour is helping me.  He's actually be of great assistance.  He's married, unfortunately, as he is super handsome.  He's my age too and I think he has a thing for me.  Well, over the last two weeks we've been bonking so I'm pretty sure he has a bit of a thing for me!!!  Things with his family life aren't going too well and I pose no threat or give him any bounderes.  Although, I would love to.  I have managed to go against every moral instinct I ever had.  Never to sleep with a married man.  I couldn't help it.  He's off work right now with a torn rotator cuff in his left shoulder.  We are pretty much insperable during the day and we've even managed to get a few evenings in as well.  I know it's wrong Dave, so please don't say anything.  It will be all over in a few days.  I shall miss him but that's the way it goes.  I know also, that I am engaged to a wonderful man).
     So, I had time to call it off and tell her to stay, but I thought things would be different when she got back here with me, nothing changed it got worse they just kept emailing she kept telling him she loved him and wanted to be there, plus calling old boy friends and talking for hours, she seen nothing wrong with that, I was dumb to keep my mouth shut on that one too, I just kept thinking maybe she just feels the need to flirt? she did it around here with people too, well I put up with things to keep the peace.
     Well we found out we were going to have a baby, we talked a lot about it went and sat at book stores reading and looking up things on the Internet, I thought this would be the thing that would bond us for sure, the first few months was great, and she even stopped emailing Randy at my request and talking more, made me feel like it was going to be forever again.
     She has a strange fascination with the FBI, she said she always has, she read every book about the FBI profile guy John? and watches every show she can on tv about the subject, she thought that her phone in CA was tapped and the FBI had her fired from MCI or was being followed.
     Then her mom came in the end of the year to see her when she was pregnant, after she left I felt she was sleeping more and not as much talk, but that was ok with me I just thought she needed it at that time, then I started to notice slurred speech......then one night my mom stopped by and Diane could not even walk strait, she was taking things that a doctor gave her, the doctor not knowing she was pregnant so it had started again, I called the hospital to ask for help and told them what she had taken they said bring her in ASAP, I do not know what happened in there no one would talk to me? she came out and lied to me and said everything was good and it was ok for her to keep taking them, and she did the same thing the very next night, I helped her into bed I said you did it again right? she said yep. and she told me the doctors said it was ok, we had a talk that night about what she takes and feels the baby does too, her reply was “I Don't Care” this was the night after the hospital and I had no one to talk to again, and she was being real nasty to me daily.
     I didn't find out till later they put her on methadone? till birth. The nurses said to watch him for the first few months they had no idea what the side effects were.
    Then after she did give birth she got real strange, it took her a few days to adjust then she didn't want anyone to hold Joshua, kiss Joshua or get near Joshua, I did say something this time like this is not right it makes all of us feel uncomfortable so I gave her space again thinking this was a faze to go through it never really got better, then she would turn it around on us like you never hold Joshua or do things, wow I cant win for losing! she never let me carry him or even the baby bag and every time we went somewhere I would ask anyway, it got to the point where I would be sitting in the living room holding him and she would walk by and grab him from me and say I’ll take him, it was like she didn't want him to bond to any of us, what was really strange was people in IHOP could pass him around and kiss him in the face, it was just us.
    Things only got worse as time went on, she got real....Her only and made all of us feel like outsiders, I let things go to long for help, by the time I started to look it was to late, we both do have very different ways of looking at life, and I do believe there is no hope for a good life together, I wish someone would see she needs help, and this lie to everyone problem, this whole year has been one big lie after lie, if that’s all I remember, lies.
    I guess she did what she though she had too by moving out, I never asked her to, and was willing to just keep the peace for Joshua, but she has this thing about travel? and wants to world hop, so for self reasons she wants to leave, and all she thinks about is self 24/7 I do not think that is good for Josh (Stable) to put self over your own child.
    Joshua means everything to me, a great deal no one knows, I want Joshua and I want to raise him in a stable home & he is keeping my Grand Mother alive, Joshua is her all, all she keeps saying is “Oh My God What a Beautiful baby” & “he is just the most wonderful little thing” and Diane gets upset when she hears grandma say that. (weird) I wish she would see this is best for all and sign Joshua over to me and she would be free to travel and do what she wants.
This whole situation is awful and I dont see any good answers for it.
 I have 8 to 10 Friends, Family & Customers that will testify to witnessing acts unbecoming to a mother, from dropping him, also leaving him in the truck and walking away, on a very hot day from a local retailer that thought how very cold & cruel. 
    This whole thing is a real shame and it is not going to be good for Joshua, and it is going to hurt all of us for a long time.
   I did talk with her Sat. Morning and she sounded ok, she is going to bring the baby by so I can see him and maybe Mom too, she said she was going to stay around town “ I Do Not Believe That For A Minute” she has been looking into going to N.Y Idaho & back to Ca for months now.

Personal observations and why I want Joshua
     She has been a distressed person (unstable) from the time she got here, she has problems, always miserable a few times a month not even talking to me for 4 days at a time, that follows a family line her mom does the same thing once not talking to her for a year, this year it was a month.
     Along family lines swearing GD & JC over and over, always talking about sex and drinking that’s all I hear over and over, when her brother came to town the first thing he did was pick Joshua up and start talking about all his sex life, I was stuned over dinner one night (keep in mind Joshua is 5 Months old) she had said some thing to Josh about a sex alternative being with guys, wow I did say something to that, you teach a child his ABCs and math not sex with guys, does nothing matter to these people or is that there culture? anything goes there are no limits no boundary lines or morles, she tells people right to there face “she dont mind lying to get what she wants, I’ll lie to anybody” For these reasons I fear for the mind of Joshua and his safety.

Doctors & Meds.
     Meds. She has been doing them from day 1 she calls doctors and they call in stuff for her and she goes and gets it filled, I do not understand how this can happen, dont they know, she says she hurts somewhere and they give her what she wants, then she says its not working and they call something stronger in! Even the mom says she cant fall asleep with out pills, her brother must have brought something over with him because he told her not to take to many of what he gave her.
     With out presents of mind when her eyes are glassy I fear Joshua will get hurt or and that did happen at times when Joshua almost fell off the table, and she was bouncing him on her leg and Joshua fell on the floor face first, she just picked him up and said opps, I hurt for that little boy I tried and tried to talk with some one, I did not want to call dfac that was last resort.
 And she tells others how easy it is all the time she says just lie to the doctor and tell him you have a headache and he will give you what you want, she is proud about that fact.
     Because of the pills she is sleepy a lot and puts stuff in Joshua’s milk bottle like Advil and Tylenol and he is just way to young for that and it makes him sleep all the time, she goes through a bottle every two weeks, Just so he sleeps and she don’t have to deal with him, This is No Good! I asked the hospital and they all said not a good thing but when I said something about his welfare she would get real mad I had no control what so ever, there is so much more ground that needs to be covered.
 Because of the stress that she felt she was under, stating she feels her life was over, boxed in or feeling traped, She has done this a few times now.

Money lies for over a year, Standing in my living room one day talking to my mom and she said again I don’t care who I lie to as long as I get what I want, now we see how far this has gone......
     Theft of checks made out to me, she forged them and cashed them, two accounts this month I can prove Brian Garrett $75 & Mike Ayers $75 all the money orders are not trackable. That’s gone. When we were working for tech-1 doing networking she was telling me they were holding back money we would get later, well I have found out she was telling me we were making $250 and my checks were $1000 and over, boy did I get bent over or what.
     Lying to my friends to get money every week, a company in town called RPTIA she was telling them she was making a web site and doing typing at home and charging them for it $250 or so a week telling them the Web Site was coming along and not doing one page! the papers she was typing she didn't get 1/4 done with, they lost a lot. (Over $2000)
     Taking money out of my pants in the morning I would get up and find the money I needed for something was gone, Once she tried to take $200 and tried to make a joke out of it.
     I gave her anything she wanted, when we walked through a store I would say get any thing you want, even if I had to spend bill money, it didn't matter to me, I even spent my rent money when her brother came to town last week.......And I lost one of my big accounts in order to buy her a bird. All I wanted is for her to make Joshua #1 and both to be happy.
     I had no idea, but family and friends said they seen this was coming, she just wants to wander. She emails me all the time and tells me she loves me, and she don’t know what she would do with out me? I dont get it. She would also email others and tell them what a great guy she had, I have the emails to show....When she was in a bad mood she would email me to say she was sorry and that she still loved me, I cant believe all this is happing because I told her I was not going to sign the passport form because I did not think she was going to bring Josh back, She has said she wants to raise him in England, and I don’t think that is a good idea or best for Joshua.
     She did turn in the last few days, I had told her I would like to see her stop using the Advil on Joshua, she told me she hasnt used advil in a week, Now she is slick and knows how to twist words because she is using Tylenol now, she is a very good actor, and knows just what to do and say. Then the other night Joshua was crying so hard for over an hour, when he has gas I can just put him over my shoulder and pat him on the back and it takes care of it in a minute, but this time it was real bad and I wanted to call and ask some one about it and she went real mad, so I was just walking him around the house, his belly was tight I could feel it rolling, I felt real bad for him, I wanted to ask if she changed the formula because she buys the cheap stuff sometimes and the doctor said it wasn’t good to keep changing it or I thought it was the Tylenol causing a problem, so I was going to walk him out side we have a swing he likes and it calms him down, she yelled don’t take him out side, (my mom lives close) she said my mom would hear and everyone would think she was a bad mom for letting him cry, Putting her self worth over Joshua’s comfort, so I told her if it dont stop soon I was going to take him to the ER I dont care if I look stupid....we gave him some gas drops but I didn't want to wait so we went, it started to work on the way there and by the time we were in the ER he let it out both ends and was ok, the doctor said he was ok, she was so mad, but when you care for someone you don’t care about looking stupid.
     Her last email to her mom as we walked out the door was real nasty (I have included it, printed from a security server log file) it was a lot of F word F him F them “F baby” and again she said she wanted to go and just leave Joshua, this to me is so sad, I feel real bad for him and just want to make him feel better somehow. There is a fun, loving, happy side to life.
     Every child needs a stable family, and to grow up little at a time, he needs time to just be a baby, kid & young adult to learn from mistakes and learn from others, He needs to be loved & not used as a pawn for spite.
     The other emails and server logs I printed out are also included
Her Ex-boss at MCI emailed me by accident when she was fired just before she came here and that email details that she was let go after failing a drug test then she declined taking another one and was let go.
     She picked a good day to leave because I cant do anything till Monday, so she must have had this in her head for some time now or someone is filling her head with things, it sounds like what everyone else does. So I hope everyone sees through the lies.
     All she has been talking about for months is sitting on the beach in Greece and tells everyone like its going to mean something for some reason to a 5 month old.
     I would not sign for a few reasons (1) Fear of Flight (2) babys to young to travel to a bunch of strange countries (Germs)  (3) 6 weeks is a long time to be away from Dad (4) The gas bill is a nessitity Not sitting on a beach in Greece for weeks (5) It servers no reasons other than self, “where your treasure is, there your heart will be also”

Update Sat. Night
     Now she called me a few times from where ever she is, trying to get back in with me, asked me at 6:30 Sat night if I wanted to go out and have coffee with her and talk, and she wanted to come over to pick some CDs tonight, I am not stupid, I feel as though she was going to try something, she asked me again to sign the passport form, I will not do it. And she said “she was sorry that she even had Joshua”, again, I am tired of hearing that and I dont ever want him to hear that!
I am not sorry we had Joshua he is the best little thing that happened. She knows how I am.

Update Sunday
     Now she is starting to realize the bad choice she made by doing what she did the way she did it, I am sorry I know now she wont ever change and I cant take this again, after what she has put me through and lies to make me look bad & cheating on me. Today when she called she asked if she could come back because they are going to make her get a job in a few weeks, and she dont like it there because there is no cable TV. They make her pray 6 times a day, and made her be back by 8pm (she didnt like that) I think it is bad for Joshua to be in a situation like that in her condition, I trust that someone is watching them because I really fear for Joshua’s welfare now more then ever, and I hope someone will counsel her because she knows I am going to fight for his full custody. The only reason she would fight to keep him now is to spite me and my family and not for any other reason.

     I Loved her, I called her my wife, I do not know if she knows love, I always wanted to think she loved me somehow, but I now know she never did, I accept that, its going to take a lot to bridge that trust again and take down this wall that stops me from being hurt. I cant deal with the day to day lies no more or the spite that goes along with it.

     She may not even know how bad she hurt me, on the other hand she did know it was all part of the server key logs and even said “I hope robert is reading this” maybe she did it all knowing what she was doing and in that case is a very cruel person to have said some of these things about me and my mom for over a year now, knowing I read my security logs. She has said cruel things to my face but I didn't add them because that’s hear say that I cant back up and I wont do that.
     To keep reading that the women your living with flirts with everyone even to see it when I am out with her right in front of me, emails old boyfriends and tells them she loves them more then I hear it, and she wishes she was somewhere else - with someone else I have been sick over it for a year and a half now, I had told her from time to time but I also didn't want to sound to....
 Now knowing all that she kept me at arms length and never let me bond thinking she was just going to take off at any time, she is not happy here in Newnan.

How would anybody resolve this mess.
 
Great Grandma says when your in the river you gota swim.

 I went to great length to preserve all the info contained in these page to be Fact and Truthful to the bitter end, nothing in this is here say or 3rd hand.

I thank you for now looking into this matter, after a year of me asking for help from anyone who would hear.

FRIDAY morning UPDATE
I dont know what to believe or who to trust anymore  Fri now 7 days

In RE: to Diane Louise Cullen 1/26/64 - Joshua David Donahue 4/11/2001

There is a leak in a place of trust and it can only be one of two people,  A case worker or sonny (and there maybe a reason I dont see)
She told me “they” said I was going around town trying to destroy her? 
Sonny told her what DFAC had on her was damaging.
How can you now conduct a clean investigation? I feel like a fool, she was tipped off from day 1

About the Advil, The reason I wanted to talk to some one is I wanted to find out how much was to much! I Dont Know.... I did not want to say anything until I did Was it Ok? ask the doctor if he did tell her and how mush to dose? I read the side affects of advil last night on the web for children under 6 months
I told her she may have nothing to worry about after a blood test, and needs to take one to clear. I want him tested for Liver damage, that's simple!

 Questions I have also, How Josh acts of fright and jerking 
 Joshua did look different Wed. when I seen him last, I dont know what it is? it may be just stress

    Words of verbal abuse that until I talked with DFAC I didn't even know, But I told Kathy Broadwater Supervisor at DFAC
From day one she called Joshua Little Fucker! (for 2 Months) after I told her I did not like that at all, then she started calling him little Bastard and now calls him little Bitch, As you can see I am not happy with that, it is Child Abuse here in Ga.

She is moving out Sat. morning from that home.
What are the requirements that she is talking about that she needs to move out?
She said do you know how hard it is here they are also going to want.........then she stopped

She said she was moving in with a “sonny” that works there, she drives Diane around to find a way to get Josh a passport “Atlanta” and she lets Diane use her car and Diane dont even have a drivers lic. driving my son around.

She is supposed to be in a safe place? and she has filled 4 or 5 this week....
CVS Tom the pharmacist
Both Lee Goodrum’s
Super Walmart
Publix
Krogers & Peachtree city
Also find out the dates so you can tell what she was taking when she was pregnant, it should have stopped around Dec 19 after I took her to the ER

Only the Dr. I know of?
Dr. Greenwell 770-251-5540
Dr. Moere & Corr 770-251-5540
Dr. Hull  770-631-9999
Dr. Riley  770-252-6767 white oak
 
 

One forged check and the other is on its way back to me
Bank of America Check # 1511  Teller 004
July 20 2001 CC# 217-353 Diane cashed it # 04787-00882 - CA